You don’t know the power

This, is some guy. I named him David.

David is quite honestly the most normal person alive. He goes to work, eats healthy, and counts out exactly 574 rice crispies for his breakfast every morning. He wants to be less normal. So he goes to the store, and buys some delicious, spicy, Awesome Sauce.

David then drives home in his little hybrid car, and enters his two bedroom home through his red door. He goes to his kitchen filled with the plainest equipment ever. He slowly opens the bag his Awesome Sauce was put into. He peels off the tape keeping the cap on tight, and puts his lips onto the bottle. He tilts his head back, and lets gravity do the rest. Then, this happens.

See, Awesome Sauce is some pretty rancid stuff. It’s powerful, and will make any sandwich ten times better. But it will not make you more awesome. In fact, it’s just the really, really strong Tabasco sauce that isn’t allowed to be sold outside of Mexico. If you’re awesome, you don’t need anything to make yourself better. If your lame, you just need to do it yourself. The “Awesome Sauce” is only used to get rid of all the wimps in the world.

Wanna be awesome?

Get off your computer and go do something awesome.


One response to “You don’t know the power

  1. Sparkleton's Human

    AWESOMESAUCE!!!! Sorry. I am a raging SparkLife addict 😀 Only a true Sparkler knows the power of Awesomesauce. And David too. Now excuse me while I dawn my Confidence Pants cause this stuff is legit.

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