Spartan Skills!


Frequently, people ask me this one question, “How do Spartans do all their crazy shit and have that much skills?!”
Well, the truth is, they actually go into the matrix. They hook themselves up to these sweet computers and they learn all of their moves in a matter of seconds. But to get to those computers they have to go into the Ultrix. Which is an even deeper state of the Matrix. So there are basically three of every spartan. One not in the Matrix, one in the Matrix and one in the Ultrix. So it’s really just like real life Inception! Except not due to Copyright laws! So anyway, they go to the Ultrix (no one knows how except them of course). They learn crazy-ass moves (like how to dodge bullets and bend backward at a ninety degree angle while flailing their arms). And they come back out of that world as complete BAMFS and save the non-real world (because the real world is the Matrix). Got it?~IJUSTOWNEDYOU11~

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